Always Something to Try

It must be time to get started. I have run out of excuses, and I have too much to say. So, this is me…

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You should know right from the beginning that depression has always been a struggle for me. And I mean ALWAYS, even in elementary school. Sure, I was silly and studious, and by all accounts happy. But I was also sad and constantly aware of this heaviness of heart. I honestly can’t blame any particular life circumstance for it. In junior high school, I was forced to face the fact that depression was simply a part of my nature.

I tell you this so that you understand that my search for the best life is vitally important to me. In ninth grade as I lay staring at the ceiling with no desire to go to school or see my friends or even move, I knew this darkness would be with me like a second skin, and if I didn’t find ways to combat it, depression would keep me from ever doing anything.

My mom helped me to see that I could do something, that I could try antidepressants or try talking to someone about my feelings. I could turn to my faith and pray with my whole heart. She introduced this concept to me that I did have power. There was always something to try.

Now that I’m thirty years old and still struggling with my old second skin, I’m re-focusing on all that I can do to pursue happiness. I want to show you (and myself) that life is full of joy and light, and YES . . . hope.

So I work on taking care of myself, giving my body what it needs and engaging in the kinds of activities and habits that make good health possible. I keep on learning and reading about other people’s experiences and what the social scientists are saying so that I can cultivate all the happiness that is possible for me. And I keep as close as I can to my faith and my religion so that I can call upon a greater power to get me through the times when my own strength is not enough.

So let’s get started with this thing!

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